December 30, 2013
Does It Really Have to Be A Drama?
Looking at DRAMA and how we create it instead of speak our truth, especially when speaking our truth makes us feel vulnerable. We act out instead. We withhold, we provoke, we defy... But as Newton noticed, every action creates an equal and opposite reaction.
The problem with drama is it involves other people. The more responsible thing to do is own your feelings, work through them, look at their origin, process them in your journal...do ceremony to release them...communicate that you are doing this... and then, if necessary, speak what needs to be said, not the words that make you come out on top, but your truth. Then let balance unfold as it is meant to be. True, speaking your truth is going to create an effect as well but it usually brings you back into balance rather than further away from it. Our truth is the true North on our moral compass. Please, let's use it!
November 13, 2013
Authentic Self Love
It can be painful to see the subversive plots we lay to attract attention and love... When we are still hiding it from ourselves we will have this undercurrent of self loathing... because our higher self wants to be authentic and we know we can't respect ourselves for being inauthentic. This keeps us looking outside ourselves for the validation we know we can't give ourselves yet... and the cycle continues... But when we see our grand schemes for what they are, wanting to be loved, and when we can own them, we can drop the subversive behavior that sickens us about ourselves. In the end we find we love ourselves much more because we are authentic, and we can then look to others for it much less...
November 12, 2013
What You Deserve
Reflecting on the concept of deserving... My question is this, Who is keeping score? Who decides if in fact we do deserve something or not?! The whole concept of deserving is based entirely on a tally our ego keeps. None of it is real. We all deserve the moon! It reminds me of the concept that if we are good we will go to heaven. The rewards for living a good life are a good life, not some external pat on the back. And if we do deserve something... that implies someone else may not... What is that about?!
"No, I am sorry, you cannot have that... you do not deserve it"??? WTH?! Are we in kindergarten here?
And what if we 'don't deserve' something... He 'didn't deserve to be treated that way'... Again, who is keeping score? Stuff happens... the concept of deserving it makes it personal when in fact the unfolding of the universe is... just that... There is nothing personal about it.
October 30, 2013
The Withholder’s Drama
The Withholder's power lies in the drama WE create in response to their withdrawal. Our reaction, in their minds, then further justifies their actions. Can you resist the bait of taking their actions personally? Do you really need to indulge in high drama...? Usually when we do, abandonment and rejection are part of our old stories. When we do our personal work around these issues then a Withholder is just that... someone left standing there holding onto the ball they took out of play.
October 18, 2013
Loyalty And Selfishness
Thinking about the Q'ero word "ayni" today and how that relates to loyalty. Ayni means right-relationship, harmony or balance... When we are loyal to others, over ourselves, when we are more concerned about their hurt feelings than being true to ourselves, we are not in ayni. There is a difference between being loyal to one's self and being selfish. Selfishness is usually rooted in fear and scarcity. It comes from a sense of lack...Loyalty to self is listening to your higher self, the intuitive part looking out for your highest good.
As much as we think we are being honorable and selfless by putting another's feelings first, we hurt ourselves when we do not honor our inner voices first. Our Judeo-Christian ethos is based on martyrdom so putting our voices and needs aside to please another "feels" like the right thing to do... But ultimately we are telling ourselves "You are less important that this other person." You are not!!
September 15, 2013
We Are Not Our Our Brother’s Judgments
People judge. It is the intellect's way of protecting itself from threatening or uncomfortable situations. As we awaken we learn to step back from judgement and use discernment instead. Discernment is different from judgement in that there is not an emotionally based classification made, there is just a yes/no evaluation. Yes that feels like the right thing to do, no I don't resonate with that person. We cannot make others stop judging us but we can be comfortable enough with ourselves to not collude with other people's opinions of us. Judgements are not personal, they are made from within the mind of a person evaluating the safety of their environment based on their lifetime of experiences. They have everything to do with the perceiver and very little to do with the perceived. When we collude with their judgements we can lose sight of our uniqueness and strengths and feel the lessor. This often stops us from standing in our light and pushing through our fears. We cannot stop people from judging but we can choose to hold true to ourselves and maintain our course.
August 29, 2013
When we remember that nothing is truly personal we stay out of victim thinking. No one is doing anything to us, we are just experiencing their reactions to their environment, which we may be a part of. They may even mean their reactions as personal but it has way more to do with them, their history and imprints, than it has to do with us.
August 13, 2013
Tell Me… Who Are YOU?
Will you be caught in the vortex of someone else's projections, and play your part because you love them or cannot bear to defy them, or can you find a stillness to stand in, waiting until the storm passes, and stay true to who you came here to be?