March 06, 2014
Holding A Grudge
Tags: entitlement, Selfishness, acceptance, blame, control, forgiveness
To hold a grudge is to insert a fishing hook into the mouth of the offender and drag it around behind us forever. It is to build up a huge wall and meter out crumbs on your own terms... watching all the while to ensure your meagerness is responded to properly. It takes a huge amount of energy to hold a grudge and the true loser is the one holding it.
The first step is to forgive.
The second is to recognize your needing to forgive shows that there is still a hook in there making you a victim. Not to say that what happened was right or ok... but when you truly let it go, there is nothing to left forgive. We are then unburdened with maintaining this illusion of separation... This division we built up dissolves... allowing the energy we have been hoarding to flow again, freely…
October 18, 2013
Loyalty And Selfishness
Tags: Selfishness, Empowerment, Loyalty, self respect
Thinking about the Q'ero word "ayni" today and how that relates to loyalty. Ayni means right-relationship, harmony or balance... When we are loyal to others, over ourselves, when we are more concerned about their hurt feelings than being true to ourselves, we are not in ayni. There is a difference between being loyal to one's self and being selfish. Selfishness is usually rooted in fear and scarcity. It comes from a sense of lack...Loyalty to self is listening to your higher self, the intuitive part looking out for your highest good.
As much as we think we are being honorable and selfless by putting another's feelings first, we hurt ourselves when we do not honor our inner voices first. Our Judeo-Christian ethos is based on martyrdom so putting our voices and needs aside to please another "feels" like the right thing to do... But ultimately we are telling ourselves "You are less important that this other person." You are not!!