November 01, 2015
Many of us, with our huge hearts in hand, reach out and help our fellow beings in their struggles and times of need. While this is a natural extension of our human capacity to love and care for one another, there is an archetype called the Rescuer that is a much different animal.
The Rescuer starts off innocently enough, as someone who wants to help, but they soon become seduced by the power of their role. When we help someone else we are in a position of strength that the other person is temporarily without. If all we do is reach in and help them stand up again, we have answered a call of service. Many of us learn early in life that by rescuing the struggling members of our dysfunctional families we feel better about ourselves. When we start doing it for personal gain, we are no longer performing a selfless action.
To ensure our survival, our egos, like wily octopuses, are always looking for something to cling to and define themselves by. When helping shifts from a selfless action to one that feeds our self esteem, it becomes a vehicle for feeling good about ourselves at someone elses expense. Energy is a tangible commodity that is exchanged between all things. One of the principle laws of the Universe is the conservation of energy. If we are feeling a strong energy boost from helping someone else we have to ask ourselves where that energy comes from. It is normal to feel good about helping someone in the moment, but if we are pulling energy from others to feel good about our selves regularly, we have succumbed to the shadow side of ego.
Many Rescuer’s repeat patterns from childhood, choosing primary relationships which revolve around another’s dependance upon them. They may attract mates with illnesses or friends who appear in need of help. How we “hold” someone, or perceive them, creates the kind of relationships we have with them. When we see someone as dependent, helpless, or otherwise limited, we create a power differential. While many Rescuers thrive on this dynamic, the people in their lives will eventually need to regain their footing, as their struggles are simply lessons on their journeys, not a permanent state. Inevitably this leads power struggles, and often breakdowns, as the Rescuer strives to maintain control. As the indigenous masters teach, true power comes not from power over an individual but from our ability to connect to Source and co-create.
Many Lightworkers learn at an early age that if they rescue, they feel better about themselves. This is the very drive that leads many to the Healing Arts. Part of the training in becoming an exceptional healer is to do our personal work. By going deep inside and healing the wounds and imprints that say we have no value unless we help others, we step out of the wounded ego that needs an outcome. We can then transform our pain into gifts of compassion and empathy instead of looking for it in another. According to the indigenous perspectives, healing is simply being available to hold the high vibrational space for balance to be restored. It is only from this place of service, over helping with an agenda, that we can do the selfless work of Healing.
This is a good model for us all. To show up as a friend, instead of a Rescuer, is to see in the other their strengths, instead of looking for their weaknesses. Balanced relationships cannot thrive in an environment of judgement and the pity that puts us above another. It starts with ourselves. When we can have compassion for our own limitations, and stop projecting them outward, we can step into grace and wholeness and the infinite relationship possibilities that lie therein.
Christina Allen’s work as an Intuitive, Healer, Teacher and Founder and Director of the Austin Shamanic Center, combines a strong science background (BA Physics, MS Neuroscience) with decades of applied ancient spiritual wisdom (Master Yogi, Reiki Master, and profound Shamanic Healing based on Q’ero Indian traditions of Peru). Learn more about making private appointments, and upcoming classes, at www.AustinShamanicCenter.com or (512) 391 9829.
© Austin All Natural, November 2015