Sign Up for Our Newsletter

October 01, 2017

Deserving and Entitlement

Tags: Feeling Entitled, I deserve it, serenity, Lao Tzu

Entitlement is a self imposed claim on recognition, a flag in the ground  stating I deserve special treatment. Perhaps we are smarter than everyone else, or maybe more spiritually awakened. Maybe our spiritual teachings even say we are more entitled. You may believe your social status, gender, or race, sets you apart. Your choices on what you eat, or do not eat, may give you that notch above the rest. Perhaps it is the kind of car you drive. You may even think you have earned differential treatment because you have worked so very hard to get it.

Another way people feel entitled is through wounding. They have suffered more than another, so they deserve a break. They deserve retribution. This kind of entitlement is insidious, it floats beneath our conscious thought, motivating behavior and clouding our judgement. It becomes that chip on our shoulder that justifies bad behavior. The world owes us something for all of the pain we have endured. We deserve compensation.

Many kinds of wounds drive entitlement. Some are personal. We were abused, abandoned or rejected by our biological families. Some wounding is cultural. Atrocities have happened within the evolution of our towns, cities, states and nations, often in the name of a religion, race, or even gender. Sometimes it is both. However these woundings happen, at whatever level, they leave huge chasms that run deep through our hearts, separating us from our perceived abusers, indefinitely.

Most of us, when wounded, retreat from the sources of our wounding and vilify them. It’s natural. We may even sow seeds of hate around them. This will never happen to me, or my children, or my children’s children, ever, ever again! It is easy to point our fingers at the entitled across the fence and be outraged by their assumptions of superiority, or their need for retribution, but we all have to look at how this divisiveness lives within us. We all hold the blueprints for humanity living within us. By putting ourselves up above the fray we stand out and are ensuring our survival. The more we dig in with arrogance or self protection, however, the more self righteous we become, and the more animosity we generate.

This is not to say that we should not stand up for our equality, that is a given, but let’s take a look at this word deserve and see if it serves us collectively. It implies a claim, that justifies a reward. I am this, so I deserve that. It is based on individual beliefs and judgements about our personal  worth, not inherent truths. No race, religion, birth order, nor gender is any more valuable than another. To imbue one with more is misguided. We are all here to compliment each other, and create a complex whole. 

How do we overcome our differences and sit together at the table? So many atrocities have occurred, and so many more in the name of retribution. What will it take to accept people who are different as equals? What will it take for each of us to break down our walls and forgive each other, to move on? It starts on a personal level. When we change it within, we start the process for the whole. Take stock. Look at how your beliefs support divisiveness. What did you learn to identify with at home, in school, in church? When the fires, winds, earthquakes and waters ravage your lands, and strip you naked, who are you then? No one is keeping score here except our egos. We don’t deserve anything, we just are. We can choose to love one another but we cannot demand to be honored. We earn that by our actions. As Lao Tzu says: “Do your work, then step back. The only path to serenity.” 

Christina Allen, an Intuitive, Healer, Teacher and Founder and Director of the Austin Shamanic Center, combines strong science (BA Physics, MS Neuroscience) with decades of applied ancient spiritual wisdom (Master Yogi, Reiki Master, Shamanic Healer, based, in part, on Q’ero Indian traditions of Peru). Offering profound Shamanic Self Development Workshops and personal healings. Learn more at or (512) 391-9829.

© Austin All Natural, October 2017.

ASC Newsletter

Please fill out the following form to signup for our newsletter.


Sign Up